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Name: Matthew
Birthday: 5/29/1984
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Member Since: 11/17/2003

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Monday, May 22, 2006

Funky Vibe

Just dreaming of a moment wish i could be better the words i used to use were so much better the things iwould say had more meaning i guess these songs are no edge and demeaning i can tell by the words that everything is sad everything is broken sometimes i am bad i am writing this to say all the things are ok im telling you in time my problems wont go away im happy to say all the words that come out im happy to tell everyone not scream or shout im happy to say all the things are ok reading back on events i wish i could say all my problems were back to normal and that things were alright i have an awesome friend who i love close and dear my girlfriend Caelly i do love her sincere she makes me who i am and people cant seem to understand they always tell me im whipped they are just too stupid to understand with a relationship their is compromise and thats all that i can say the same words im older wiser and better here they all come to play.  I plan on getting married i will invite some no one i dislike will be likely to come and if people ruin this day i will beat them down with a yard stick in hand and an upside down frown.

Ranting and raving im rapping again not being real angry not playing pretend i havent done this in a long time this is what i was sent to do im my mean time I am  through with this im sorry but the crap is a hit and miss.  No one can see im on the clock my misery is breaking and my heart cant stop she makes it go and increases the blood flow i know we want to be married and i know she wants a ring im sorry that im poor but this i will sing.

I will love her till the end of time i will love her and make her mine all mine i will tell her all my secrets and tell all my truth i will tell her what i know is the answers and all i can say is I love you.   This song is sappy and thats all i can say i love her and thats the only thing that matters at the end of the day.  We may argue sometimes but we always make up in the end you get on my nerves as much as i do yours we get along 90 percent of the time i wish i were hers until the end of time until the end of days when i hope the rapture could take me away im trying to make known that times are what i have the good and the bad and the long times were bad.

Here is the truth never knew my dad he was there and all but only made me sad turned my anger to violence and i know that was wrong every other time i would write a song it would be so mad and angry so suicidal im sorry just wasnt happy with the life i had to live my mother did threaten to disown me and hated me for being my fathers son im sorry i was i am sorry i am torn i am sorry you dont love and that you pretend to even care leaving me behind i started to grow cold im almost a year older and im seeing to grow bold im sorry but im nothing im sorry but im something im sorry that im listening to what you told me years ago im sorry im just an accident arent I mom so if i become famous and rich and everything is great for me and if i am happy dont bother me again im sad i have no family i cried my last tear my future wife Caelly made me cry and made it clear i never had a family and that is the truth no detectives needed nope dont need a slouth im so uncouth and people think that i am crazy and losing my mind all i can say is that im lazy and im finding my prime the happiness i have now has made me a bit wiser i am sorry i was acting as though i was an old miser... with all this life i live it true take this as an apology from me to you im sorry for all the swearing i did as a kid im sorry for all the people i fought and all the people i hurt im sorry for all the things i did im sorry i was evil and im sorry i stole im sorry im stupid thanks for the counsel im sorry for everything i did that was mean im sorry please let this be meaning to the mean im sorry for everything i ever did was bad i just hope in the future i will be a good dad.

Ranting and raving im rapping again not being real angry not playing pretend i havent done this in a long time this is what i was sent to do im my mean time I am  through with this im sorry but the crap is a hit and miss.  No one can see im on the clock my misery is breaking and my heart cant stop she makes it go and increases the blood flow i know we want to be married and i know she wants a ring im sorry that im poor but this i will sing.

I will love her till the end of time i will love her and make her mine all mine i will tell her all my secrets and tell all my truth i will tell her what i know is the answers and all i can say is I love you.   This song is sappy and thats all i can say i love her and thats the only thing that matters at the end of the day.  We may argue sometimes but we always make up in the end you get on my nerves as much as i do yours we get along 90 percent of the time i wish i were hers until the end of time until the end of days when i hope the rapture could take me away im trying to make known that times are what i have the good and the bad and the long times were bad.  But now as time went on you brought happiness to a person who was sad.


Monday, January 30, 2006

My eyes start to bleed and my brain doesnt know why i start to cry and the angels just start to die i cant seem to hear all the voices they want me to hear the things i say dont seem to be clear here i am i try to do all that i can im sorry but i dont think i have a plan im sorry but i dont think i can command here is all that i have to say hear my demands and know that i will fade away....here is all of my commands all i want is to wake up in high demand here is that answers to the questions in high demand im here but im lacking a plan.

 

Hey all i wanted to write a song but i dont know im kinda depressed and didnt want to finish writing it not sure why im sad right now just think its my depression and the whole chemical inbalance oh well hope it goes away later today.  Oh well peace out and chill it.

 

Sincerely,

 

Matt


Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Another Boy BAnd Song

 

Elemental Praises

By: The Alchemists

 

She is my only desire  her eyes are like rubies on fire i wonder how she could have hated me so much the heart i had went away im sad and lonely now im cold to the touch i hope for the end of the day for all the things i notice all the crap i went through shes bored with me now after all we have been through i dont know why but i think she lies when she says everything is alright...everything is alright between me and her she is just being nice rather to tell me the truth im sorry if im ignoring you im sorry if im uncouth here are the things i have to do and things i want to say i loved her with all my heart and then she went away ....ohhhh hooo she went away.

My desire and my heart melts i have never felt this way before she loved me and now shes bored im sorry but now i am torn between you and this other im sorry but im not another i have someone else she said to me and now i reside in my own...misery wooohooo in my own misery.

I saw her and my heart felt as though it had been crushed my stomach turned from solid into mush i remember when we first met she and I didnt get along all that well later we dated and things went real swell now i think she bored now and im her hell...i think that she is bored now and im in hell not sure if she loves not sure if she cares her publicity is all that she will for care all this i can do now and all this i can say i hope that you love me back the way that i say i love to you and this is what i want a person to understand me and what i do want and this is the truth now and all i have to say is that i have my emotions tangeled up and well its not ok.

My desire and my heart melts i have never felt this way before she loved me and now shes bored im sorry but now i am torn between you and this other im sorry but im not another i have someone else she said to me and now i reside in my own...misery wooohooo in my own misery.

Late at night i wonder why, how could this happen why oh why, i wish for better days to come but to no prevail im falling down, i hear the voices giving me the choices that i want, all the venting and all the screaming people thinking i am scheming they cant trust me and i dont care all these things are breaking in my mind... im sorry but im ok now, im sorry but i have fallen down now, the soul i have is broken now i die.  I asked the lord why oh why , why did you have to make a fool why did i have to die,

I asked the lord why oh why, do i need this misery as a trial of my honesty im sorry but i know you dont care all this stress is coming in here all i wanted was a new beginning im sorry but i started screaming all i needed was a happy hope but the fire and the ice will stop it from ever coming true even though the metal is breaking with the earth i know that i am cursed now the wind beneath me bringing me to rebirth as the water starts to drown me and this is all that i can hope....for the person that i love... leave all her troubles all behind... love me the same as i love her ...forever she would be mine...but forever is so long...and im sorry i was wrong... i just hope you the best....im sorry now its time for me to rest.

Late at night i wonder why, how could this happen why oh why, i wish for better days to come but to no prevail im falling down, i hear the voices giving me the choices that i want, all the venting and all the screaming people thinking i am scheming they cant trust me and i dont care all these things are breaking in my mind... im sorry but im ok now, im sorry but i have fallen down now, the soul i have is broken now i die.  I asked the lord why oh why , why did you have to make a fool why did i have to die.  Why oh why... did i have to die?

 


Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Chapter 3: Shady Partners and Breakthroughs

 

They finally agreed to hire me.  They set up illegal papers for my employment.  These people were not the ordinary people I would have seen in my days.  They would often tell half truths and I felt as though after they got what they wanted from me they would have killed me.  These people looked shady like organized crime.  They looked like people who would kill their parents for money.  That is the reason to why I never gave them all my information to ensure I was safe after I had everything in order.

 I was just another person in the lab.  I had benefits though because I had no place to go so they made a room for me at the lab no different from a cell except I was able to go and leave the building whenever I wanted to.

I made adjustments to the orb and ran away with my original with the new upgrades from this new era of machine.  I went back to the old building and set the orb to 50 years behind.  Something was wrong cause when I activated the machine I looked into a portal and saw a girl crying.  I told the girl she shouldn’t cry.  She was scared because I was talking to her form a purple vortex.  I told her I was just a scientist.  And this was a time travel experiment.  My name was Jon and it was nice to meet her.  “What is your name?” I asked.  She said “Mary”.  I told her that was a coincidence and that my wife’s name was the same.  That brought a smile to her face.

The portal was starting to close because the power wasn’t high enough to sustain a quantum leap.  I told her before the portal closed something I always thought and made me feel better.  “Child God created us and the world.  He also created and set motion time.  I am a scientist and time travel is what I want to do.  You are a child and you have the future ahead of you.  I want to say that no matter what makes you sad and what breaks you down the future will hold better nights and days and will make anything you think in the past relevant.  The future is what you make it and never let anyone else tell you different.” She told me thank you for understanding and on that note the portal closed and I felt relieved cause even though I failed an experiment I helped a child and that’s worth a lot to me.
     Well I snuck back into the lab and I thought they didn’t know I left but they had camera footage and I was interrogated brutally.  Finally they let me be and let me get back to work.  I learned from that day on I couldn’t really trust anyone fully because no matter what happened in the end it’s always about the money.

Three years had passed and still I hadn’t figured out why the problem of quantum leap hadn’t been solved.  I thought maybe it was just a normal one time fluke kind of deal such as an accident that can’t be reenacted.  In my years of research I was able to make the quantum hold.  For those who have no idea what that is, think about it in these terms think about heaven and hell.  And if you are a reader of the bible there is purgatory.  Not many devout Christians believe in this place but it’s a place like a quantum hold.  Basically you are neither in the past nor the future you are in a cell waiting to decide where you would like to go.  It’s this century’s idea known as a waiting room.  I was able to isolate Chronotons and make a bubble.  I was able to shape near time.  But distant time is something that would have the hardest to attain.  I figured out that near time is a time that surrounds you like water.  It has no real form but of the container it holds.  Since the world is a sphere like structure that means that it’s a sphere.  So I am able to take a bubble of that sphere and surround me so time is neither displaced nor changed its just stalled for me.  Distant time the time field able to go into the future was almost attainable that meant if I was able to do that I would be able to reverse the current and go back in time but hopefully my theory is right.  I felt like I was making great strides but something was out of place people around me were acting funny.  I wondered what they wanted with this project if they had it and I wondered what they would do if the problem of quantum leap was solved.

 

Chapter 4: A friend to the end

 

I made one friend here.  His name was Marty Reinhold.  He was the closest person to a person I could trust.  He was always honest with me and he would always invite me to his house for dinner with his wife and kid.  He told me that his father was named Jon and I was a little shocked at the coincidence his father was named Jon and his mother was named Mary but I never really thought about it.  Everything wasn’t the way I thought it was going to be so these coincidences just rolled up my back like nothing ever happened.  I enjoyed being over the house I actually felt as though I was part of their happy family I wish I could can say that I was part of their family. 

There was nothing really outstanding about them just a normal typical suburban family.  We both worked in the Quantum division.  He was the department lead and also a genius to boot.  We had so many ideas he was the only person to challenge my intellect and tell me new ideas I had never even thought about before.

A theory came to my mind.  The machine never seems to work at the lab yet it worked perfectly fine at my previous lab the same building where I talked to that girl Mary.  What if the machine only can work at specific areas?  That would mean that there are not just Chronotons that would mean that there would have to be something else there.  I did a sweep of the lab and realized that the there was an anomaly there.  A spectrograph indicated that there was a Quantum Hole or in other words a worm hole.  I bet there are these points all over the world and only these certain spots are where time travel are able to be used.

I got back to my lab and my friend had been beaten to a pulp.  I was stunned and knocked out.  When I woke up the chairman of the company was there Mr. Reaper.  “So Jon I hear you found something out about the orb and its ability.  I am happy to hear the great strides in your research with the quantum hold and such but I also heard you found worm holes?  Please explain.”  I said “Well you see when a worm digs so deep into the dirt they make holes.”  Mr. Reaper was not amused and continued to torture poor Marty.  “I ask again what is a worm hole do per say?” said Reaper.  I quickly replied, “Okay, okay leave him alone I will talk.  A worm hole is a hole that was created from disturbances in gravity and from what I think could be the link between goings in and out of time.  Much like a vantage point or jump point I’m not completely sure but I think these points may also distort time and make it possible for a successful quantum leap.”

Mr. Reaper looked so happy he locked us up and didn’t bother to inspect the orb.  He grabbed it and ran to the vantage point.  Luckily I wasn’t dimwitted.  I took a key part from the orb I took the CPU chip from the side panel.  Without that they machine was like a basketball no use you could maybe shoot hoops with it but it would be worthless then that cause it can’t bounce.

We grabbed some supplies like a gun and tools.  We decided to go to the building and get what belonged to me back.  I was tired of people stepping on me and me caving in.  I have been misused and abused by my whole life.  I lost my child and my wife.  All because of this stupid project I lost everything.  No more.  I had enough of what they did to me I had enough of what happened to my friend.  This was an unforgivable act and I needed to exact revenge for what happened.  I was tired of being nice I was tired of being a stepping stone this time I fight back this time I fight with cause.  This time I fight for my future.  This time I fight to go home back to the past.

  

 

Chapter 5: 50 years

 

     Marty and I went to the building there was thugs all over the place their orders were to kill on sight if they saw either of us there.  I figured by now Reaper would have noticed the CPU missing and dispatched for us to be transported to the building to make Reapers dream a reality.  We went to the building as soon as we entered we were caught.  The guards took us to the worm hole and made us kneel in front of Reaper.  “So you thought you were clever with disrupting it. Now fix it or I will blow you and your fricken brains out.”  Well I took the orb and held it I quickly jabbed the jabbed the CPU back into place and braced for the object to turn.  I said to Reaper “Maybe some other time.”  I activated the orb and turned on the bubble to stop them from entering the vortex.  My friend broke free and got me some time it was like watching snails fight when I was in the bubble.  I saw my friend was close to the bubble and saw he was about to get shot so I had no choice but to grab him and save him from getting shot.

I quickly grabbed him and we started to warp into time.  It was just like last time a purple haze had swept over me and I it felt like every part of my molecules at been torn apart and reassembled.  It wasn’t painful but I felt as cold as ice when I was out of the portal.  We both awoke on a building skyscraper.  The problem was we were in the basement when we were in the lab.  This meant that the Earth must have shifted and the portal realigned or the fact the ground below sank so much that the portal was just as if it has always been; just the soil and ground below had altered drastically.

The building was gleaming white the pollution had been cleared up with a bright orange sky light a sunset in winter it was beautiful.  It was an eye opening experience.  We ended up investigating.  I looked at my surroundings and realized I still wasn’t home.  I got frustrated and wondered why is it I keep leaping forward, why can’t I go back to the time I want to go to.  A huge holographic billboard showed the current events.  It was clear I was in the future but as my eyes opened I saw it said December 14, 2055.  In one sec my heart plummeted and I realized why I couldn’t go back in time with the orb. 

I pondered it and came to a conclusion.  The orb was just a port device and time is like an ocean.  When you throw something into it the ripple may occur causing disturbances.  If you don’t have a boat in the ocean you go along with the current.  Since time is a line and not a circle you will only head down further and further if you don’t have a device to help you row your way back. 

I was so angry when I explained it to Marty.  He tried to comfort me but it was no use.  I had lost it I started laughing hysterically.  Marty asked me what was wrong.  I said “Ha ha ha ha ha don’t you see Marty?  I will never see my child or my wife ever again ha ha ha ha ha ha.  Those three years I was stuck in your time was a useless endeavor.  I have no chance of going anywhere.  I am stuck forever in this time and if I go I will just end up going 50 more years forward.  I am so fucken stupid why the hell did I think I could control time.  I think I could be God and I thought I could control an ocean a river.  I thought I could control a force immeasurable in its vastness of existence I thought I would be like Chronos but all I did was ensure the fact of what others said about me I am a fool.  I am just a fool to believe that anything I did in my life was worth a damn.”  Marty replied “Jon shut the fuck up!  Stop feeling sorry for yourself so what you made a mistake you’re not the only one not able to see his family.  You think I wanted to be here.  I know you want to go home but sulking and being self condemning isn’t going to take the fact away that you are here in the future and you know what so am I.  You think I wanted this fate wow the second person to travel in time woop woop shit dude I would have rather been home with my wife and kid watching a football game on the tube.  You know what man I have faith in you and having faith in a time when there is no chance is the only thing you can have.  Just remember man fallen are the wicked and rising are the good.  Never believe just because you had a bad time and nothing is going your way you should give up.  Giving up is what marks the end man.  Giving up is what makes you fall.  When we are stuck all we can do is look for a way out.  Help me look for a way out.”  So Marty and I walked down from the top of the roof and found a lb much like my old one it was gleaming and perfect all white and nice.  It was clean.  Then I heard a voice…”Jon is that you?”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 6: A way back home

“Jon don’t you know who I am?” said the women.  I said “How can I know you?  I just arrived in this place.”  “Jon it’s me Mary.  That day you talked to me when I was sad.  You told me something I would never forget.  You told me to never give up and to follow what I believed.  The reason I cried was because as a child I believed in traveling in time and I was made fun of.  I felt so isolated.  No one believed in me, but you Jon you saved me from others when they would put me down I knew there was someone out there able to help me.  I knew you were out there I knew you were someone who understood what I thought.  I started to research you.  I found the classified documents the whole cover up.  I found out about your research.  I picked up on the research.  I found your flaw too.  By now you know that time is a line.  But did you know if you can build a beam you can ride it like a train.  Using light to transport you through the spectrum is the only way to pin point when and where you will end up.”

“How is it you can use light to transport?” I said.  “Well Jon with an intense beam of light you can shoot it through the portal and since you molecules are split up the carrier beam can just beam you to the exact time you want.  Well in lame man’s terms like a salmon swimming upstream the beam fights against the current like a bullet while your molecules reside inside the beam and since it’s a carrier beam its like an empty beam no heat just a shell of energy” said Mary.  “So when can I go home?” I asked.  Mary said, “Whenever you want.”

So Marty went first instead he took the beam and went back home.  “Marty since I am sending you back remember this you won’t remember me or this place and you will not remember Jon.  In fact when I send Jon back this won’t exist and neither will this machine.  When Jon goes back all of this won’t exist.  He will have gone back to the root and all of this alternate future will be destroyed” said Mary.  I said bye to Marty and thanked him for his help I was sad to lose a good friend but oh well that was all I could do.  “Thanks Jon you I know I never told you this but I never knew my father he disappeared when I was kid.  My mom was sad could you look into that for me when you get back to your time.  I don’t want to grow up alone and since you are going back to the 50’s could you look for him.  My mom remarried to a bastard who ignored me so I never called him my father he was just an ass and I was forced to have the name Reinhold.  I never knew my original last name my mother would often get drunk and would often avoid telling me what it was.  Sadly it went to the grave with her and if you would please here is the address they use to live at look them up and tell my father to stay.”  “Okay Marty I will do everything I can to help you out.”  I stuck the paper in my pocket and didn’t think anything of it.  I said my good bye and they left.

“Ok Mary beam me up” I said. “Bye Jon and thanks for being the nice guy you have always been.”  “Bye Mary thanks for making my dream come true.”  “Same to you Jon.”

In a quick flash of light I found myself back at my lab in 1952 the exact time I left and the exact place I was.  I was dumbfounded to find myself home.  I ran home to see my Mary who I missed for oh so long.  It felt like an eternity since I got to see my wife.  When I got home and I saw her I noticed her smile.  She said I love you and I said I loved her too.  I could honestly say at that moment I was the happiest man alive.  For that moment nothing could break me down.  This ordeal taught me something.  I knew that time is what makes us all what we are.  I remembered the journey because of I was the root of the equation.  I remembered what Marty wanted.  I found the paper in my pocket.  I read the address and found to my surprise it was the address for my house.  I was Marty’s father.  I never knew that my wife was going to have a boy. 

 

Chapter 7: 9 months later

After the time traveling I realized that staying in the present and looking forward to the future was the best place to be.  I found myself at the hospital waiting for my wife to give birth.  If I was right she would born me a son, a son who I will never leave and always be there for.  I never told my wife about the whole incident and never thought about telling her what had happened in thought of the fact she would have said I was crazy and my flights of fancy are what drive me to stupid thoughts.

The baby was born and she told me it was a boy I told her I knew and she said how did you know?  I told her it was a strong feeling.  She said I want to name him Marty.  I told her Marty is a strong and a very dependable name and that he would be a son that would make me proud. 

That is the end to my adventure through time.  I destroyed the orb and wrote the incident off as just a dream.  I withdrew from the government job and told them time travel was impossible.  I hope that Mary in the future has a better future and still continues on her path and I hope that as time passes and I get older my son becomes the man he was when I met him in the future.  I am happy everything came to a conclusion.  I am happy to have my wife, and finally I can honestly say I am happy to have my son I will never leave them ever again and that I promise.

 

 

 

The end

 

 

 

 


Monday, December 19, 2005

Chapter 2: Quantum Leap

 

For three grueling days I pondered what was going on.  I was so angry at myself here I was going to have a child and I haven’t the funds to support it.  It’s the year 1952 and it’s already December.  My wife is 5 months pregnant and I don’t know how I can solve this equation.  Then I did the worst thing possible I spilt water all over the machine.  The machine I built was the size of a globe it was silver with a plutonium core.  If I had short out a circuit board I probably would have taken out the whole city.  Yet I noticed something, the orb was glowing.  I grabbed and a sudden surge of electricity whipped me into a hole.  I was weightless and I felt as though I was just imagining things.  The orb and I went on a trip none ever taken before, a trip through time.

This big purple vortex opened in front of me and spit me out.  I ended up in a place I hadn’t seen before.  It took me a while to notice that I wasn’t in my home anymore.  I was in an old abandoned building.  I found the remains of broken walls and mildew growing all over the place.  The stench was horrid and so was the city, so much pollution and so much decadence.  The orb was all I had left and I didn’t know what I was supposed to do.  I ended up at a library.  I saw the newspaper I read the date it was December 18, 2002.

My dream had been realized but why was I tossed 50 years into the future.  Why was 50 years left behind?  I started to research about the project it seemed as the government covered it up and my past was also.  I couldn’t find answers and I couldn’t find a reason to why things had gone this way.  I set the indicator on the orb for 10 years into the future which was bold enough due to the fact I had no idea of going backwards in the time line.

I was homeless and had to find a job so I could resume construction on my project.  I didn’t know what I was going to do.  I did not have no papers, no evidence I existed nor did I have anything to help me except the orb.  I heard on the news about a company call Algenic Quantum tech.  This company was working with the mechanics of time displacement and travel.  I went to their office and was denied access due to the fact I had no credentials and they thought I was a loon.

I was waiting out the door to the Algenic Quantum tech lost in thought and then it came to me how to show them I was on the level.  I went to the library and found an article saying I was missing, and wanted for questioning for a project.  I didn’t know it then but I was setting in motion a chain of events that would forever alter history.  I thought maybe time travel shouldn’t have been done maybe it is just something that man shouldn’t have succeeded in.  There were so many questions that would run through my mind but for the most I wanted to back home to my time to my family and if I had to I would give up this project just to be with them.

I showed the head of the company my article and told him who I was.  They were hesitant to believe me then I said something to their head technician.  “So did you discover how to pass through the Quantum manifold?”  The technician said “No not yet, any suggestions?”  I replied “Well you would need a power source of at least 10,000 kila joules and a source of plutonium.”  I told him how I over loaded the power core of the orb which made me leap into the future.  He looked at me as though I was mad.  Then I showed them the orb.  It gave them ideas they hadn’t even thought about before it was like they were witnessing the birth of Christ or at least if this worked they could.  God help me for what horror I may unleash.



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